Why I had Kids

This weekend has been spent alternating between back pain and spending time outside in the real world and finally final studying.

However there was some moments that I wanted recorded for posterity in all of that. I was in the bathroom getting TT to go potty and I turned and realized, there was a boy standing there. Not my baby, not my toddler, but a real life boy. He had long arms and legs, corded with little boy muscles and his shoulders are broadening already. He’s a big tall boy too, nearly as tall as Vaiy who is a tall five year old. Infact this weekend I realized that he had grown out of his size ten shoes and now needs size 11. He’ll be four this august.

It’s so hard to let them grow up, sure I’m pushing potty training which is going much better thank you Miss Fayne and the Ft Worth Zoo for helping him have some incentive and a good few days to work off of, but even though I’m pushing for the potty training I am still helplessly caught watching him grow in leaps and bounds and wishing I could have my tiny little monkey boy back just for a little bit.

I realized yesterday though, that kids growing up have some benefit. Having realized that it had been months since Loren and I had taken TT out for a family day we decided to throw caution to the wind and ignore the finances for a moment to go to the zoo. I am so glad that we did. We’ve been taking TT to the zoo since he was inside of me, and while he’s enjoyed it on some level each time, this is the first time I think he’s really been a interested participant. He was so -excited- about seeing the animals. He planned out our route on the map they gave us ala Dora (“First we go over the hippos mommy then through the elephants!”). He actually shook with excitement at the lion roaring and lost his little mind over seeing a white tiger.

He got to play with birds in the aviary and pet goats and calves and pigs at the petting zoo. He had the best time and even though he was exhausted and we had been there for nearly five hours when we left he still sobbed and threw a fit about leaving the animals. Today and lastnight he’s asked repeatedly to go back, the zoo made a huge impression and he can’t wait to go back to see the animals again.

It was so awesome people. I had the best time watching him get so excited, it was everything I had ever wanted when I had thought about having kids. He was like a little beacon, and everyone around him lit up as he lost his mind over the penguins or clutched the fence and stared at the cheetah with rapture. He was so wonderful and the end of the day was picture perfect with Loren carrying him against his chest, his little droopy eyes watching me over his shoulder as he laid there saying goodbye to the zoo.

This is why I had kids..this is what makes all the hard times worth it.  When he was born I said that I had never known that I could love something or someone this much. I was right, though I didn’t know then how much more I could love something or someone.  The tiniest tyrant is also the best thing that ever happened to me.

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1 Comment »

  1. 1
    metasilk Says:

    Yep. Yep yep yep yep yep yep.


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