Things my son does

I figured that since this blog is titled after him I should put down some of the things that he does that makes him a wonderful dictator. Plus I’m in the throes of watching toddlers and studying like a fiend so I’m not really up for long thoughtful posts.

Such as:

  1. He has a wonderful habit of being adorably bossy. Such things as ‘close your eyes mommy!’ are bantered about when he is reading you a book. Then he completely breaks your heart and rots out all your teeth with sweetness when he charmingly orders you to ‘close your eyes up!’ when he wants you to open them.
  2. When he’s looking for help with a book or a movie he will march around in front of you holding the book or movie at eye level with one hand, the other hand curled into a fist a finger pressed to his chin as he goes ‘Mmmmmm alright’ over and over again. When you acknowledge him, he’ll leap in surprise, eyes wide and demand ‘lea’me’lone! I’m reading!’ until you pester him to help him read. Then he will given in with an authoritative ‘ Alright, Alright, lets sit down and read’ and march to the nearest chair or couch.
  3. When you are not giving him every tiny little ounce of your attention and he needs it, he will reach up with both hands, grab your face and physically turn you to look at him. He will not take no for an answer and no matter how many times you wrest your head away to do something inane like pay attention to the book you’re studying or perhaps the dinner you’re cooking he will determinedly grab your face again.
  4. He marches up, fearlessly now, to anyone and says in his little tin can bark voice ‘I want to talk to you!’ finger waving about impudently, as he interrupts anything that is going on without a qualm and launches into his day in -great- detail. He seems to be positive that everyone is going to find it just as interesting as he does.
  5. He has informative meetings with the cats. Poor Rose (named after Dr Who) is often surprised and confused when a tiny tyrant comes along and sits down with a toy or book and begins instruct her. He gets very passionate, waving the object du jour about in her face without touching her as he tells her all about it. It’s like he’s preparing for war room scenarios for the future.

I think this should be a ongoing addition to the site, not only so that I can prove how intense my kid really is, but so I have a record I can use against him later in life when he is protesting the fact. I can’t wait to trot out these things on prom night, or better yet when he brings his first serious girlfriend home. Evil runs in the family after all!


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